Adolescent Anxiety: A Modern Malady Fueled by COVID and SNS

Recent statistics show that teenagers are living in the most anxious generation in history. In 2025 statistics, the proportion of students who reported experiencing sadness or despair severe enough to interrupt daily life in the past year reached 21.7% for male students and 29.9% for female students. This phenomenon is similarly observed in other developed countries like Europe.

Professor Kim Bung-nyeon cited the COVID-19 pandemic and the emergence of social media (SNS) as the main reasons for the increased suffering among adolescents. The experience of isolation during the two years of the COVID era significantly impacted the formation of social relationships among adolescents. With the advent of SNS, teenagers are constantly compared to others 24/7. He explained that exposure to a powerful SNS environment while lacking relationship experience is having complex effects on the current mental health of adolescents.

Adolescence is a crucial period of brain development, particularly for the frontal lobe, which is responsible for emotional regulation and decision-making, as it undergoes remodeling. During this period, temporary deterioration of frontal lobe function can weaken emotional regulation and interpersonal skills. Additionally, under the influence of sex hormones, the sensitivity of the amygdala, which is responsible for emotions and survival instincts in the brain, increases, amplifying negative emotional responses.

Professor Kim Bung-nyeon emphasized that the process of frontal lobe reorganization, or 'pruning,' is not necessarily bad. Through this process, the brain evolves into a more personalized and efficient 'supercomputer.' Adolescence is a period of heightened sensitivity, capable of determining life's direction, and the pain experienced during this time should be seen as a necessary developmental stage for maturity. This means it is an important opportunity to reflect on oneself and establish identity amidst suffering.

Parents should closely observe changes in their child's daily rhythm and behavior. In particular, if problems such as sleep disturbances, low mood, suicidal thoughts, or self-harm impulses persist for more than two weeks, professional help should be considered. Professor Kim Bung-nyeon added that self-harm or suicidal thoughts can be more common symptoms than expected in adolescence, and he recommended recognizing the seriousness and intervening actively.

The most important thing in communicating with children is whether parents and children have experienced communicating on equal terms. Adolescents have a strong desire to design their own lives, so parents' unilateral instructions and control hinder effective communication. The core principles of family communication are empathy, communication, and encouragement, through which parents should show respect for their child as an independent individual.

In conflict situations with children, it is important for parents to adhere to three principles. First, an empathetic attitude aimed at understanding the child's feelings should be prioritized. Second, maintain a patient communication style, listening to the child's story to the end. Third, an encouraging attitude is needed to conclude the conversation by expressing gratitude for the child's attempts and efforts instead of criticism. It is important to respect the child's desire to do something and support that desire.

When a child's emotions escalate and the amygdala in the brain is activated, survival instincts awaken, and defense mechanisms kick in. In this state, rational judgment or dialogue becomes impossible, and the child enters a 'shutdown' state, no longer thinking. Parental criticism is a major cause of such shutdowns, so when it is determined that continuing the conversation is difficult, it is wise to pause and schedule it for another time.

Professor Kim Bung-nyeon emphasized that parental encouragement critically influences a child's attitude changes. A communication style that disregards a child's feelings can lead to the worst parental roles. When the principles of empathy, communication, and encouragement are applied repeatedly, the child and parent can develop into a relationship where equal discussion is possible. Parents' positive encouragement forms the foundation for the child to adopt a positive attitude themselves.

The high school dropout rate has shown an increasing trend every year recently. As of 2024, the number of students who dropped out of high school was 27,065, an increase of more than 1,000 from the previous year. This figure represents 2.1% of all high school students, indicating that the dropout issue is becoming a social concern.

Children who leave school tend to feel that they have failed within their current group, or that the failure is irreversible. For children experiencing frustration in an overly competitive environment, schools are unable to offer realistic alternatives. This phenomenon is analyzed as a complex interaction of expanded choices and negative experiences with school.

When a child decides to drop out of school, parents should focus on the 'selection process' rather than the 'decision' itself. Impulsive withdrawal without preparation is likely to leave the child with great regret. Children should be given enough time to reflect on why they feel they have failed and whether the cause is distorted. Parents should support and encourage the child when they prepare their own alternatives and make a ready start. The key is to help the child think and prepare sufficiently during this process.

Anxiety is a universal human emotion, and feeling anxious does not automatically mean it is a disease. When overwhelmed by anxiety, people tend to react avoidantly, either fighting or fleeing. However, the key is to use anxiety as an important lesson to change oneself. Especially for adolescents whose frontal lobe function is immature, instead of criticizing them for feeling anxious, a supportive attitude that helps them understand and manage anxiety is necessary.

When a child makes a significant decision, such as dropping out of school, Professor Kim Bung-nyeon suggested a 'one-month grace period.' This is to ensure that the child has enough time to explore information with parents and deliberate, rather than making an impulsive decision. During this period, the child gets an opportunity to collect themselves and recover on their own. If recovery is difficult even after the grace period, parallel treatment with a specialist should be considered. This process can help the child avoid hasty decisions and plan their future from a long-term perspective.

The most typical case where parents should actively intervene in school is school violence. If an imbalance of power occurs due to school violence, parents must step in immediately to protect their child. Also, if a child is experiencing developmental difficulties such as ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder), parents should share relevant information with the school and communicate to establish a supportive environment. In such situations, active parental involvement can provide the necessary help for the child.

Professor Kim Bung-nyeon emphasized that the parental role should start from recognizing the child not as property, but as a 'precious guest who has come to us.' The ultimate goal of parents is to act as guides who help this precious guest grow into an independent adult and live their own life someday. Supporting the child to gain strength and independence on their own is the essential role of parents, and it is necessary to accept that they are beings who will eventually leave.